Thursday, January 31, 2008

never knew...

Ok, so i am at work again...browsing the net and i nosed my way over to baileys page and then from hers, i went to her friend taytums. i had to stop myself from crying in front of the boys! i felt everything she was saying! she just found out that her and her husband are finally preggo! and i say "finally" because of her little journey to get there. When jimmy and i first got pregnant, we were NOT planning, so we are one of the "accident" couples that she spoke about. then we became pregnant with Jayla and were REALLY excited but took it for granted and became the "its so easy" couple. we found out we would be expecting baby #3 in september of last year. as soon as i found out, i told everyone..."no big deal." i went to dr's appointment on october 31, halloween, to hear the heartbeat and never heard it. two ultrasounds later and a trip to the hospital finalized the idea i did not want to accept. I was under the impression that i had two healthy pregnancies before, why would this one be any different??? It hurt. my cousin and his wife went through this on their first one and i didnt quite understand until it happened to me. I feel for the couples who never get a chance to experience childbirth and being pregnant and i am lucky enough to have done it twice already. yessss, i am one of those women who do NOT get sick and i love being preggo! i think having jimmy and the other two children in my life helped me a great deal with the miscarriage. i never had to experience the uncertainty of whether or not i could even get pregnant until now. We still want more kids but knowing the we have little control over what happens, it hurts and its scary. so sandee, sometimes i cry when i read your blog. you know that our due dates were within, what, 2 weeks? i love you and all my girls that are preggo or have kids or are trying... or not at all. i just wanted to say thanks to those who helped out and supported me and the fam. LOVE YOU! okay, thats enough of the mushy stuff, not so much me. thanks to taytum for reminding me just how precious our children are and the gift of life is!

9 tags:

The Prince Fam said...

Okay so now you have ME tearing up. I hurt for you because I know that you were hurt. It was so hard for me to tell you about our newest baby. I know you are happy for us but at the same time, I know it still stings. I too, took healthiy pregnancy's for granted until what you went through and what my own sister is going through. I now, more than ever, realize that it is all so fragile and to not take it for granted. I love you Jamie and am so glad we are still friends after all these years! You are a great friend and a fun mommy, your kids adore you. Keep your head up, it is going to happen for you again... and soon!

Melissa said...

Oh!!! I'm so sorry to hear you miscarried. It seems like there was a wave of pregnancies, and now there is this sad wave of miscarriages - I've had several friends in recent months miscarry. And many of them are pregnant again and are doing fine. Stay strong. You're not alone. Love you Jam!

{Mullins} said...

Sorry to hear about your situation, Jamie. I'm so glad you do have 2 little ones and a supportive hubby, I know that's what's keepin ya goin. We've been thinking of you guys. xoxo ...in the meantime..you can always bbsit for me... ;)

BAILEY LAUREN said...

Geez, you're sitting right in front of me and I got teary -eyed. The Lord has his hand in it all. He knows whats best for you and your family. He knew you were strong enough to go through that trial. I love you and your two sweeties...and your time will come again!

Trevor & Taytum said...

Hey! Bailey directed me over to your page to read this entry. I am so sorry about your miscarriage. She actually had told me about it a long time ago and even though I don't know you very well I was so sad for you then. Reading this just made me feel it even more. The worst thing of all was that I had a cousin and a friend that had babies and carried them 7 months or more and lost their babies. I felt so guilty for ever having negative feelings that they were pregnant and I wasn't. It was so tough. I was happy for them, but jealous. Then when they lost their babies I felt so guilty for ever feeling that way at all. Thanks for sharing your story. And I hope you don't mind me checking your blog!

Your kids are beautiful. I know you'll be blessed with more.

kristi june said...

I don't talk about infertility with many people but I can say I honestly feel your loss. Hope you're surviving. XO

Eric, Briana & Family said...

Jamie, I'm sorry you had to experience that. I went through it a couple times and know the sorrow. So true how we take it all for granted when it comes so easily for us. In that respect, maybe it's worthwhile to have a loss in order to gain greater empathy for those who always struggle with the possibility of having children in this life. Take care. I love you. ~Bri

Celular said...

Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Celular, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://telefone-celular-brasil.blogspot.com. A hug.

The Bostock Fam said...

Jams~

I have never heard of that brand of jeans! sorry.